Sunday, February 1, 2009

*My short story

"So why don't you have a boyfriend?" He asked.
"I have many friends that are boys" She replied.
"Well you know what I mean... Why don't you have a boyfriend?... A lover?"
"So you're asking why I haven't found love with anyone? Why someone as driven and ambitious as me doesn't have that same attitude towards a man?"
"Well... I didn't mean to get you angry or anything... I just---"
"Oh no no, you didn't get me angry. I'm just answering your question."
"I know but... the way your answering it is just... completely not the way I imagined it to be."
"That's because you don't know a thing about me, but you have a generalization of the majority of people in the world. Ambition and drive. Compassion and understanding. Communication and trust. Love and responsibility. That is why I don't have a boyfriend.
"Okay. Now I'm completely lost. So you're saying... You're too good for a relationship?"
"Too good? No. Not good enough? Maybe. A relationship is difficult. A lot of people aren't good enough for relationships. They may want it enough to have the label, but that's far from genuine. I haven't come across anybody ready for something as deep and powerful as a real relationship; To know how to truly handle being in love, and understanding what difficulties come with it. No one can handle difficulty anymore. Once they face a small hinderance in their "relationship", they become posessed by feelings of trepidation because they don't want to work to understand the perplexity of it. And that's where it ends."
"Wow... I'm speechless. I mean. So you obviously have things figured out. Or... You don't, but... Well I mean, like you are smart enough to say what you just said. I think I get it, but I don't."
"Good, so you're not so lost. No one will ever get it. Nothing makes sense anymore. There's always a statistic or a belief or some kind of myth that tries to relate nothing to everything. But it's thoughts like these that trigger a kind of mental high. So we keep searching. We endeavor and we calculate to find an answer that is not able to be found. It's our stimulant. It's my stimulant."
"Honestly, now I think a boyfriend would just hold you down. Listen to you. Your mind is incredible, not a lot of people are like you!"
"Everyone is like me. They've simply turned away from or haven't learned to find the capabilities of their minds. We can all transcend typical thoughts, we just need to escape."
"Escape what?"
"Escape what's holding you down."
"Well... I don't know what's holding me down... I just can't do it. Or... I don't know how to. I don't know, I'm not that driven I guess."
"There's your answer. Now escape it. Find that world where you can no longer have solid answers. Transcend routine thoughts and rise above what people want you to think about. Find yourself. Well, only if you want to."
"Ha, I do. Well, I don't know. Seems like a lot of work. But you, miss, will never hear me ask you why you don't have a boyfriend ever again. Previous relationships must have really slowed you down in the past, right?"
"Oh not at all. You asked me why I'm single right now. Obviously it was them who couldn't keep up."
She gave one last smile to the dumbfounded barista at the coffee shop. He watched her walk gracefully out the door, her face beaming as she smiled and looked up towards the warmth of the sun. He wondered why her smile did not make him want to smile back. Wasn't a smile supposed to make you happy? He shrugged and walked outside pondering about the event that had just taken place. He paced back and forth, his back heating as the sun shined on him. He then too, looked up at the sun just as she did. But instead he frowned and shielded his eyes.

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