I am a fearful person. I often find myself caring too much about what people think about me. That fear affects the things I choose to say, the way I act, the things I do, etc. I always see people doing amazing, passion filled things on a daily basis, and I think to myself "that'll never be me." When I get into this mindset, I often feel guilty for being such a useless person to God. I also get existential and question God if He really did make me for a reason, and if so, what reason?
Tonight, God put on my heart that He is the bigger picture. I remember hearing on the radio, a man, speak of his story of when he became a christian. He started seeing the world in a different way, and realized how bleak, violent and ugly the world around us was. He said to the Lord, "God... Why don't you DO something about this?!" And God said to him, "I did. I made you."
We need to look at the bigger picture. This is ALL for Him. God is the bigger picture. We were all carefully, and fearfully made. Even before we were in the womb, He, the Creator of the universe, knew us. Let that sink in. God doesn't make mistakes.
"The sun rises, and the sun goes down, and hastens to the place where it rises. The wind blows to the south and goes around to the north; around and around goes the wind, and on its circuits the wind returns. All streams run to the sea, but the sea is not full; to the place where the streams flow, there they flow again." - Ecclesiastes 1: 5-7
Just look at the way God made the world. The sun, the wind, the ocean... they work in perfect unison because they were made by the Creator.... For us. The world looks so big, but we are bigger. We were made to show the world who Jesus is. It's hard to see this when we get consumed by the busy microcosm that is our lives, but we just need to stop for a second, take a breath and look at the bigger picture.
It takes passion to be a follower of the Lord. And I'm only human, so fear discourages me on a daily basis, and the enemy tries to tell me that I'm not part of God's plan. But I was FEARFULLY and CAREFULLY MADE, and HE KNEW ME BEFORE I WAS IN THE WOMB. He will never leave me nor forsake me, so long as I have love and faith, fear will not hinder me. Without Him, I'm lost. I'm freefalling into my destruction. I've tasted of His love, I've seen His heart for me. There's no going back into normalcy after that. THIS is my normal. This should be the world's normal.
It's easy to feel small. But we're all part of the bigger puzzle piece, and we're all essential for its completion. Use me for Your glory, Jesus.